Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Christmas and Christians

Um, so, those of you who celebrate this holiday because you believe in all the christian hype, I have a news flash for you: some of your brethren are seriously bad advertising, y'know?

Like, why do grumpy people go to malls? It totally isn't my fault that you lot have decided the only way to celebrate the alleged "birth" of your sun god is to spend a lot of money. If you're pissed off about spending it, either don't do it, or have a lot of wine before you do it, but don't bust me over it. I didn't make you go to the mall with your over-tired, bored kids, for whom you're buying crap they don't need so that they shut up and leave you alone...

Um, and those of you who are in such a damned hurry to get to the mall to spend your hard-earned credit limit (because I KNOW you are not spending your own money), yeah, you still have to signal your lane changes and yes, you do have to turn into the correct lane and you are absolutely an idiot for thinking that the rules don't apply to your ass, and no, you don't get to be pissed off because you're a crappy, angry driver and I just honked at you. Get a grip!

And in case it isn't evident, I cannot stand this ridiculous, consumeristic orgy that is supposed to be the banner holiday for your peace and love movement. If the tempers and drama in my family are any indication, christianity and these stupid christian holidays should be abolished because the participants are criminally insane.